Thursday, February 12, 2015

Does Age matter to Filipinas when marrying a foreign national?

Does Age matter to Filipinas when marrying a foreign national?

You will often see Filipinas dating much older men in the Philippines.  You will see a 20-something woman walking in a park or having dinner with a white guy who is over 40 or 50 years old. Sometimes the couple looks very happy together.

I think this is because many Filipinas seek the comfort, love, understanding and stability that an older more experienced man can bring.  Many Filipinas lack a father figure.  So when they find a man with these qualities they are more than willing to give the opportunity a try.

Unfortunately, stable male figures are very hard to find among filipino men.  The good ones are usually taken.  The young, handsome men are busy with two or three women.  So older foreign guys are a natural attraction for a single Filipina who has already had a bad break up with a young filipino first love.

Filipinas often gravitate toward a father figure.  A responsible, matured guy who is not afraid of a serious, long-term commitment.

photo from bellanaija.com

I have found that many filipino guys are dependent to their parents (not ALL but many I met).
Some still live with their parents or their decisions are based on what their parents think or say which is not good in building a healthy marriage. It can actually make the relationship shaky (including my parents).  It is cool to have blessings and guidance from parents but it is NOT cool to have parents involved with every decision that a couple should be making for themselves.

Another unfortunate trend is that many Filipinas are impregnated and left behind by irresponsible filipino guys so they end up finding another father for their child/children to be able to raise them better and to have financial stability.  There are very good Filipino men out there, who are great role models and incredible fathers.  I am not talking about them.. those guys are usually taken.

Marrying an older guy is not unusual in the Philippines. Filipino women also marry older Filipino guys who are doing pretty good in the home country.

Age differences don't worry most Filipinas.  We focus more on stuff like manners, personality, financial status and upbringing of our men because these factors have the most impact in the relationship.  As long as the guy can still perform in bed, everything is kool ;)

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